Just My Thought :)

     Did you ever think that life is so unpredictable? I did. And it is. Every day is just another surprise. Nobody told me that I could actually move from a very small village to the city when I was 7 years old. I thought I would spend my whole entire life there. But I could. And no one told me before that I was pretty good at math in elementary school, but then suddenly when I was in middle school I'm very bad at math, still actually, until today. And I never thought that I was that happy when I got my first ever bike. Then no one knew that my first bike will give me so many scars on my legs and arms.
     Love is probably the biggest part of life, and it is super unpredictable. It can give you heartbreak but also it can give you a feeling that you haven't ever imagined before, it just feels so good. When I first ever had a crush, I felt like I was in the next level of happiness. I thought to have a bike was the happiest moment in my life, but it wasn't. I was in 3rd grade at that time, he was in 4th grade, he was my neighbor, we saw each other a lot, almost every day. He always found a way to talk to me all the time, he said that he likes me. Of course, we weren't dating cause we were just kids, but we were good friends. But like I said, love is unpredictable, time past by, we grew up and we became strangers for each other. I met him once at that time but he didn't say a word, neither did I. That's funny, right? how everything changes!
      I used to think that my life will be okay all the time. I never imagined that I will feel depressed in my life. Of course, you don't know what am I talking about, right? so let me tell you a bit. It took me 17years to love myself physically, cause I used to feel insecure about my appearance, but finally I do now. But mentally? I don't think so, about 4months ago, when I went back to my hometown, I felt so depressed, I can't even sleep before 2am in the morning, it wasn't like me at all I regularly sleep before 00.00. Every time I close my eyes, my brain couldn't stop working. It played scenes from my past, it kinda reminds me that I should feel sorry about myself that I never did good jobs and my life doesn't even matter. sometimes it is about future, same, it scared the hell outta me. I started to cry a lot at that time. But thank God, I'm okay now.
     so random, right? I don't give a damn. Pardon my messy grammar. Peace out!