A Slam Poetry

Hi people! What's up? This time, I post slam poetry and this was actually a college's assignment. Hope you like it!

         

A broken arrow

By Tissa Risanto

We’ve promised on behalf of our little fingers

As my heart received bright hope in front,

you put me in trust our future with no suffers                                         

no I didn’t smell, it is from an evil ant

You pull the trust arrow from my heart

It was there, now it is a hole pain

Nature has warned you!                                               

But the ego defeat the pure heart

You can’t stab your arrow back

you can't give me your "so fake" effort

You can’t re-put cause it’s already crack                       

You can’t allay this suffer heart

Picture by https://weheartit.com/entry/102883235

Dine and Mike: Oh Dine!

                          

      Dine was sad last dinner. Mike made her sad, he was silent during the entire dinner. Dine was so confused, she just ate her dinner while she's also holding her tears which about to fall down. Dine asked Mike few times about what's actually going on but Mike just said no words.

    Dine finally finished her dinner. They went back home. At home Dine asked Mike again, and he just answered that he got bored. Dine asked him what makes him bored, is it their relationship? But again, no answer.

     Few minutes later everything seemed back to normal, Mike looked like he was happy again, without talking about his problem that made him changed his mood last dinner. Things were always like that in their relationship, sometimes problems had no solution because Mike didn't wanna talk about it.

       Mike promised Dine to take her out tonight because there weren't busy and important schedule for tomorrow. Dine was super excited to hear that. Yet, Mike said that he felt so hurt in his head so he told Dine to sleep a little bit before they went out. Dine kissed him before he slept. 

     Then the time showed that Mike had to wake up. Dine was waking him up, but he seemed so upset about it. He said that she don't understand how terrible his head is. She already felt hurt actually but she still forced herself to smile and tried to wake him up again. 

     He finally woke up. Dine told him to washed his face before they went out but unpredictably he said that he just wanted to go home right away. Dine felt so hurt, because earlier in the afternoon Mike was the one that promised to take Dine out, and she already imagined a good time that they would have when they spent this night together. 

     Mike was so cold that night, Dine was scared. He grabbed his things and walked to the door. Dine held his hand, she said that they still had about 15 minutes before Mike had to go from her place. Mike said to her that she made him angry. His voice was so cold, it pierced through Dine's heart. Then he went out without saying goodbye like usual. Dine couldn't hold her tears anymore, She screamed Mike's name while he was walking out the door. 

     He left her cry alone. All she needed now was just a hug from him. She hugged her pillow so tightly. After all the tears, she just checked her phone again and again that she hope he would text her an apologize, but no message at all from him tonight. She then felt so much pain all over her body, her eyes couldn't be opened anymore.

Experience: Huge Earthquake

  

                Hi people! Finally, I decided to write something again. After a very long unnecessary holiday of writing, I wanna share one of the scariest experiences in my life. So happy reading!

                Earthquake is something usual in my hometown, Bengkulu.  I usually experience it at least once in a couple months. I kind of get used to it, because these were small earthquakes that didn’t really bother people. Yet, in 2007, when it was the first day of Ramadhan , I felt a huge earthquake. It was the biggest and the most frightening earthquake I’ve experienced in my life.

                It was a beautiful sunny afternoon in 2007. My family was preparing for Ramadhan. We cooked some kind of food. After we finished with the food, my mom decided to take a bath first. While I was waiting for her, I decided to watch TV. Suddenly, I saw the TV was shaking. I started to panic. I screamed and run outside my house, my mom and dad did the same thing. The street in front of my house was full of people. We gathered and hugged each other there. I remembered how people shouted God’s name over and over. Also, I saw buildings around me were jumping and my neighbor’s pool was like spilling.

                After about 5 minutes, the earthquake finally stopped. Soon, we got information that the earthquake measuring 7.9 on the Richter scale and potentially cause Tsunami. Everybody was shocked and scared, then they quickly packed their clothes and some important stuff to go to a safer place. My family decided to go to the house of my parents’ friend. When we arrived there, and we’ve waited several hours, we got other information that the Tsunami didn’t happen.

                It was the most horrible experience in my life. Even though the earthquake didn’t really damage anything, but still it was scaring me. I thought it was the end of the world. I was really grateful that everyone was okay and the Tsunami didn’t happen.

Some Dreams

This was just a dream but felt so real..

                     

     We're in front of a shoe store. it was my friend's. at first, we were just sitting on a kinda balcony in front of the store, me, him, my friend, and some people that I didn't recognize( maybe they're my friend's friends). But then I said that I wanted to look around the store so my friend who was the owner, he led my way. I asked my friend about some shoes that made me interested, about the price and etc. And then I saw something was going on outside, where he and some people were talking, a girl and some of her friends came to him, she immediately held his hand, and said something to him with a very happy smile. He responded the same way, smiled at her while answering her. I could see them clearly inside the store but they couldn't because I saw them through a very huge shoe cabinet in that store. she was beautiful with very bright skin, she wore short sleeves blue blouse above her knees, white sneakers, her hair was straight, long and black. and she wore a nice little bag with a long strap on her left shoulder. 

     About a few minutes, I was still staring at them, my friend beside me who was explaining about the shoes didn't even realize what was going on. Suddenly, there was a song's played by someone, I didn't recognize the song but the girl outside did, she said to him about that song, I clearly could hear what she said. "oh my god, remember? this is our song, what a coincidence" then she pulled up his hand and she started dancing like a princess by turning around her body under their hands. My heart was hurt so bad, my eyes were burning with tears but I held it as hard as possible cause I didn't wanna cry. 

      Eventually, my friend realized what was happening, his facial expression changed. I could see anger on both eyes. He immediately wanted to go out and said something to him, but I held him "please don't, please, please, let them be" he heard me, then he hugs me so tight, I cried between his arms. 

     that's all I can remember! 

              A noonmare   

     it was super abstract at first, I was ready for a party at noon somewhere. I had changed my clothes to a black dress. I sat on a long chair waiting something that I didn't know. And all of a sudden, I saw him, very close, literally only a few meters in front of me. he was standing But he wasn't alone, he talked to some friends. it wasn't clear how many people there but I only noticed a girl. She was talking to him. they seemed to enjoy that conversation. I knew her, she was my friend I mean not really but I just knew her. I know the fact that he noticed me as well but he just pretended that he didn't. I just didn't understand at that time cause he hadn't text me all day long, and now he was here talking with another girl. And then, a second later, something that was very unpredictable happened in front of me. I saw him carrying her on his back, they both seemed so happy. my heart was just beating so fast. but I chose to pretend that I didn't see it. I looked down on the ground. but then he came close to me, and now he was standing right in front of me and still carrying the girl. I just thought, " wtf is this? what does he mean?" I just almost dropped my tears. I held it so hard, but then a second later I couldn't take it so I ran from them before he had a chance to say something. I kept running and once I looked back and I just realized that he never chased me.

     

      

Sleeping in Pain

INTRO: Well, I have no words this time for the intro, so I just hope that y'all will enjoy this one and have a very blessed day everyone :)

 I hate this feeling. I fucking hate it. It hurts so bad. I can't handle it. I don't know what to do, it's just like I'm walking through a maze and I have no clue to get the hell out of it. My chest feels so heavy, I can barely breathe. My eyes can't hold a big amount of tears that come out and drop on my cheeks. I'm crying in silence.
      I'm lying on my bed again this night, midnight exactly. With my both eyes wide open and my sweaty forehead. I hold my hands so hard that my nails even cut my own skin, but it doesn't feel hurt at all. I hit my head against the wall a few times, it feels nothing. It doesn't redeem even a little bit of the pain inside my body. I don't know exactly where it is tho. The pain. Is it inside my heart? My mind? or in every inch of my body? But the thing is, it hurts so bad!
     I feel numb physically, but not my soul. I feel like someone has stabbed me with a very keen sword right in my chest that my own soul even betrays me by trying to escape from my body because she can't take the pain as well. The sword pierces right in my heart through my bones and ends up on my back. There's no blood at all but the pain is real, I can't describe it. Too painful that it makes my body feel nothing but it. It doesn't kill my heart, it makes my heart beats even faster. I just want it to stop even for a second but it just more and more hurtful every second. If it can't stop then please let my heart dies, I'm fine to be heartless, but it can't kill my heart cause it just wanna torture me.
     How long will this keep going? Because I feel like it's endless. Waking up in the middle of the night, very dark, screaming because I'm too scared with my own dream. the dream about losing you. It was actually a good dream, we held each other hands and did things that we love together. But because of that, last time I dreamed about someone in that way, he immediately left me. I'm afraid it will happen again this time. Because with him, I still could pull the sword from my chest, but with you, my soul will come out as well while I pull it out. So, I have no life to live, everything will be tasteless.
      I force myself to close my eyes, it is unbelievably hard, but I have to, I have to fight this feeling cause I don't wanna lose myself again. I try to sleep with my right hands holding my knees and another one holding my head. With my mind which is still playing the possibility scenes of losing you. I can't stop it, but finally, I fall asleep because I'm too tired of it. I'm sleeping in pain!
    
       
    

Just My Thought :)

     Did you ever think that life is so unpredictable? I did. And it is. Every day is just another surprise. Nobody told me that I could actually move from a very small village to the city when I was 7 years old. I thought I would spend my whole entire life there. But I could. And no one told me before that I was pretty good at math in elementary school, but then suddenly when I was in middle school I'm very bad at math, still actually, until today. And I never thought that I was that happy when I got my first ever bike. Then no one knew that my first bike will give me so many scars on my legs and arms.
     Love is probably the biggest part of life, and it is super unpredictable. It can give you heartbreak but also it can give you a feeling that you haven't ever imagined before, it just feels so good. When I first ever had a crush, I felt like I was in the next level of happiness. I thought to have a bike was the happiest moment in my life, but it wasn't. I was in 3rd grade at that time, he was in 4th grade, he was my neighbor, we saw each other a lot, almost every day. He always found a way to talk to me all the time, he said that he likes me. Of course, we weren't dating cause we were just kids, but we were good friends. But like I said, love is unpredictable, time past by, we grew up and we became strangers for each other. I met him once at that time but he didn't say a word, neither did I. That's funny, right? how everything changes!
      I used to think that my life will be okay all the time. I never imagined that I will feel depressed in my life. Of course, you don't know what am I talking about, right? so let me tell you a bit. It took me 17years to love myself physically, cause I used to feel insecure about my appearance, but finally I do now. But mentally? I don't think so, about 4months ago, when I went back to my hometown, I felt so depressed, I can't even sleep before 2am in the morning, it wasn't like me at all I regularly sleep before 00.00. Every time I close my eyes, my brain couldn't stop working. It played scenes from my past, it kinda reminds me that I should feel sorry about myself that I never did good jobs and my life doesn't even matter. sometimes it is about future, same, it scared the hell outta me. I started to cry a lot at that time. But thank God, I'm okay now.
     so random, right? I don't give a damn. Pardon my messy grammar. Peace out!
 

Review: MakeOver Hi-Matte Lipstick

    INTRO :
     Welcome back to my other content. I don't know guys, since the beginning, I've posted random things. well I know, that is kinda irrelevant. But who's care? I just want to post what I love, that's why I named this blog MY THOUGHTS, right? ok2, let stop this nonsense and just jump right into the main point!


     About probably 4 months ago, I was looking for a matte lipstick. obviously, because matte lipstick is really popular right now. so, I'm finally able to save some money to buy a lipstick. But I realize that the money that I've saved obviously wasn't enough to buy an expensive lipstick, because I'm just a college student who doesn't even work yet. so, I couldn't just spend my parent's money for example for kylie Jenner liquid matte lipstick. From there, I started to search matte lipstick that has a standard price for me, and finally, I ended up my search on MakeOver Hi-Matte lipstick. Then, the next day, I went to the nearest MakeOver counter from my house. At first, I was about to change my mind and buy MakeOver Intense Matte Lip which is liquid matte, but the problem was, at that counter, they only had 2 shades left, and both were nudes. The thing was, I didn't really into nudes lipstick at that time, cause I loved bold more. Finally, I bought MakeOver Hi-Matte Lipstick number015 Fame Fatale. the name tho, the name is really cool and the shade is freaking beautiful. I thought I was in love at first sight with that lipstick.

     As soon as I tried this lipstick, it straight became my favorite lipstick. so here I will explain why:
     The packaging. As you guys can see from the first picture, the packaging is so sick. I mean, look at that, very simple, slim and super elegant. and the color which is black makes it even cooler. also, it easily fits into my small makeup pouch.

     The shade. Like I said before, this is bold, which the shade that I looked for at the moment. the color is like red wine I think and that's the most beautiful lipstick color for me. This lipstick is also very pigmented, at the first swatch, the color is already popping. so, I just need a few swatches to cover my lips. And not to mention that this lipstick is very long-lasting. I wore it for about almost 8 hours last time and the color still looks very beautiful.
     This lipstick has a matte finish, so it is not glossy at all. But even tho this is matte, but this lipstick doesn't really dry on lips, I feel like it still has a little bit moisturizer, it means that the lipstick is really comfortable to wear. But for a matte lipstick, it still transfers when you touch it, but that doesn't reduce the intensity of its color.

     For the price, I think it's not really expensive cause it just costs me Rp.85.000. for the quality and beautiful packaging that I get, I really think it's super worth it.

     So, that's it, guys. thank you so so much for visiting my blog. I hope yall like it and I'll see you on my other content! peace out!